Sucking the marrow out of life has never been more enjoyable, or more fun than it has been over these past few days. I am exhausted but time has been well spent. Any investment into family is time that has been invested in the very best way. We have eaten out, laughed, played, been to an escape room, spent a day at the beach, licked ice creams, caffeinated ourselves, shopped and enjoyed each others company. Summer 2020/2021 has truly had some wonderful moments.
We have loved on family, we have celebrated, the boys have discovered their nordic heritage, they have procured drinking horns and were gifted life size, replica viking swords. If you ever get the chance to ask my son Dazz “do you want to battle” you will unleash his inner viking – because he is, after all, of the Faroe Islands. So much fun has been had but we all know that blue skies are more precious because they come with rain too.
So this past summer has also had some heartbreaking things – some of these things have changed me forever. I won’t be the same person that I once was, and thats okay. Actually it is to be expected because change is part of life. I am so much better at letting go of things now. Some bridges have been burned and I am grieved, yet resigned to it. The people who were at the other end of the burned bridges, I truly wish nothing but love as they live their lives in their way. If people and their situations take from our peace then I have learned I cannot hold on to this type of situation. My health cannot do it and I finally value myself enough to be comforted in the knowledge that our paths will not cross again. Thankfully we get to chose the kind of person that we want to be and how we will chose to treat others.
Today was filled with choices. I got to decide if I was going to hide away or if I would engage with people that I had not spoken with in years. When you are literally 100 kilos lighter than the last time that they saw you – it is EXTREMELY easy to hide. People that have known me and not seen me for a few years do not recognise me. And hey – Lets be real here for a minute – I can admit that I have enjoyed hiding in plain sight. I have done it for a few years now, but those days are over and I am, once again willing to get back to living life. It takes time to find yourself when your body morphs. It would be a lie to say that I haven’t changed because I really have. It takes time to find out who you are again. It is not always easy and it has been a process but I am finally at peace with it all.